Often, I have permitted myself to experience sorrow, understanding that it propels you into an intense cycle of reflection. Individuals will invariably attempt to take advantage of you, or even walk all over you; the art of rising again is fundamentally tied to how profoundly you’ve been forced to the ground.
I’ve allowed some to use my emotions as their playground. They’ve trampled upon my self-assurance, shattered my affection, and submerged my feelings so thoroughly that I’ve been, at times, utterly numb.
There was a period when I was truly insensate to everything and everyone. No words, neither praise nor sarcasm, could touch me; absolutely NOTHING. My belief in others evaporated, and my trust withered. I grew weary of enduring insults in place of endearments, weary of the disrespect in lieu of praise, weary of merely existing without joy. I sabotaged every ‘nice’ or ‘good’ thing in my path. I sneered at compliments, having ceased to see my own beauty, lost faith in my physical self, and avoided attire that might attract admiration because I was DEEPLY DISAPPOINTED by the world’s cruelty.
Yet, I surmounted those challenges. I pushed myself to the point of tears from sheer exhaustion due to relentless work. The need for financial security was relentless, no number of waking hours could quell my sleeplessness. I ceased my prayers. I lost faith in GOD. I doubted myself, and the sole drive in my life became earning enough to settle my bills.
Despite the hardships and struggles, I persevered. I made the decision to pursue a college education, driven by a desire for a better future. It was a challenging journey, filled with late nights of studying and sacrifices, but I was determined to succeed.
After years of hard work and dedication, I finally earned my degree. It was a moment of immense pride and accomplishment, a testament to my resilience and perseverance in the face of adversity.
Slowly but surely, I learned to love again, loving myself and others; better than before. I opened my heart to new possibilities and allowed myself to trust in the beauty of relationships. Through it all, I discovered the strength within me to overcome any obstacle and the capacity to find happiness and fulfillment in life once more.
Today, I stand tall as a survivor, a college graduate, a divorcee, and most importantly, as someone who has learned to love again. My journey has been marked by struggles and triumphs, but through it all, I have emerged as a stronger, more resilient individual, ready to embrace the future with hope and courage.
